The Significance Of Your Gaze




 
   The geography of your face and the body which one sees has a dramatic impact in a face to face encounter. Due to this importance, the gaze can be classified into 3 types: Social Gazing, Intimate Gazing and Power Gazing.
1. Social Gaze: In a social encounter, the gazer's eyes look in a triangular area on the face of the other person, i.e between the eyes and the mouth almost for 90% during the encounter. The environment is non - threatening and you will be perceived as non - aggressive by the other person. The gaze is more focused in the area under the eyes. This is often used by people when they are with family and friends while in conversations with them. It is also known as the best responding gaze when your gaze meets the gaze of the other and is also perceived as being open and approachable.
2. Intimate Gaze: This is the gaze which one gives in the triangular area between the eyes and the chest when one is close to the person and when a person is at a distance the area focused upon is from the eyes to the groin or below. Through this gaze we can know if the person is interested in you or not. People even use this when they are sexually interested in someone. Eyes are the windows to the soul and they reveal lot many things without you even being aware of it. Women have a wider - ranging peripheral vision due to which she can check on a man's body from head to toe without getting caught. On the other hand, men have a tunnel vision due to which they get caught while checking a woman as they move their gaze up and down a woman's body in a very obvious way. They end up being accused and women are rarely accused of ogling men's bodies. There is a research that has proven that women do this more often than men but men's tunnel vision gets them caught.
3. Power gaze: It is like looking at the third eye of the person - one in the center of the forehead and the two eyes. This is the triangle between the three eyes. This gaze must not be used in friendly or romantic encounters. This gaze works ideally on someone whom you want to intimidate or to make someone silent. The atmosphere during this gaze is a serious one. Often used during job interviews and during business meetings. Talking to someone holding a power gaze proves that you are confident and determined in whatever you are saying. This gaze has the capacity to make the other person uncomfortable and gives rise to feelings of submissiveness.
   The eye movements of a person can give clues as to what the mind of that person is focusing on. It reveals to us what is the person trying to do - remember something that he / she has seen, heard, smelled, touched / tasted. Through the study on Neuro Linguistic Programming (NLP), Richard Bandler and John Grinder gave the world of the theory of eye movements or Oculesics. According to this every person has a preferred representation system which is very dominant in his / her personality. The picture below clearly states the way our eyes move when we remember / construct / visualize things.




  The way a person directs his / her gaze creates an impact on the communication the person is having. For example, if you are a boss who wants to reprimand a subordinate / a parent who wants to reprimand a child,  which gaze will you use? If you are using the social gaze, there would be no sting in your words regardless of how threatening / loud you may sound to the other because the social gazing has weakened your words. In case you use the intimate gaze you may end up embarrassing / intimidating the other. But if you do it with a power gaze you get the message straight into the head of the person and it tells him / her that you strictly means business.  
   One must be aware of the gaze which you hold when you communicate with others to get through with the communication and gaining effective feedback.







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