The Right Way To Love


   Sometimes I wonder - do we love our people in the right way? What is the right way to love our dear ones? Who decides what is right and wrong? But then with experience all of us realize that to love someone in the right way we need to set them free; allow them to fly in the sky they want to fly and not suffocate them in the name of love. This is so easy to type / say, but difficult to practice. Everyone especially the emotional and highly sensitive ones among us are sooooo caring, anxious, and touchy for the ones they love. This behavior leads to many issues in their relations. Sometimes it is even on the verge of getting shattered completely. 
   The highly volatile issues that come up in any relation are due to the immense love / care / concern for the person we love. It is possible that the person we love may feel suffocated due to this excess things from our side. This happens the most in cases where one of the partner is over - possessive / when one of the parent too is over - caring, sensitive and constantly worried for the child. Such a child tends to stay away from such a parent and avoids telling the facts about his / her life fearing that the parent may not be able to digest it. This leads to hiding things and finally there is a stage when the major issues / decisions are also hidden. This lead to the deterioration of the relation - be it between couples / parent - child / friends /colleagues / or any other relation. Once there is a rift it cannot ever be mended because we humans are very fragile and unable to handle such stuff. 
   The best thing is to love the person / dear one without any expectations. Do not over burden the person because you carry the burden of your feelings towards him / her. You do not have the right to thrust your baggage over the other party because everyone has his / her baggage to carry along the path of life. If you thrust your stuff on others; he / she is surely going to get away from you sooner / later. Love but do not expect to be loved; give but do not expect something in return. This rings very true for children especially the teenagers who are immature. They have their own issues going on in their minds - psychological / physical /peer pressure and many other things. In such circumstances when parents force them into something things worsen. Every parent must learn to be empathetic with his / her own child.
   People today are vulnerable; they are not able to cope with the baggage within. Help such persons to vent out by empathizing with them, find ways to keep them calm, help them to get rid of their baggage through meditation and exercise. Understand the why, what and how of their issues and try to sort them out. Such persons too should remember a few things - accept love when it is genuinely given to you, forget your past and enjoy the present, be receptive to the ones who demonstrate genuine care, concern and love for you, your past has gone, do not relive it every year / month / second. In doing so you do not enjoy your present because of the bitterness towards your life and its circumstances. Be sensitive and appreciate the sensitivity of others for you. Live life to the fullest with humanity, empathy and gratitude in your heart for everything you have.

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